Movie Review: Quantum of Solace
Daniel Craig Posing With His Band
I guess I never paid enough attention before, but the one thing Hollywood seems to like to do is create a series of movies (a trilogy) out of all of their successful characters. Batman’s a trilogy, Iron Man’s going to be one and now James Bond. But this isn’t the first time someone’s attempted to do James Bond. There was a James Bond TV show that was made for cable, but the commercials I’ve seen for it always made it look really bad and very cheaply done and it was always different actors playing the same part. Huh? It still plays on TV, but I don’t think they make new episodes anymore. Mr. Craig, however, was able to take this lame TV show, put a bunch of money behind it, get someone not old to play James Bond (he hired himself) and turn it into a box office hit at the movie theaters.
"On a Lame Cable Show That No One Watches? Why, Yes We Are."
Quantum of Solace is the sequel for the film Casino Royal that came out a few years ago. Mr. Daniel Craig returns as James Bond, a top-secret assassin for Britain’s England who doesn’t say a lot but is really handsome. The movie has a lot of action for action fans, but not much else for an audience that may want to see more than just cars shooting each other or a lot of dynamite going off.
I will be the first to admit that I didn’t understand this movie, at all. I’m not the only one, either. I saw it with my friend Sarah (Hi, Sarah!) and she said she was confused, too. I mean, I understood the basic plot that Daniel Craig is mad because his wife drowned in the first movie *SPOILER* and he wants to blame someone. When people are sad or upset, they often turn that into anger and want to find a target for the blame when, in reality, they’re just really sad. I think Mr. Craig took this concept and was all, “What if we give the sad guy a gun?” and then made this movie. Ultimately, the man he ultimately blames for his wife ultimately drowning is a man that owns a water company. Huh?
Mr. Craig’s Bond spends the whole movie just really pissed off. It’s no surprise that he doesn’t have any
Em Is Busy Doing Work Stuff
friends in the movie. The only person he talks to a lot is his mom, Em, a Britain woman whom I think is supposed to be the queen, but it’s never said for sure. It makes sense, though, when you think about it. If his mom is the queen, then it explains why he doesn’t get into trouble for hitting people. If he hits you and you complain, the queen would probably put you in front of a firing squad and yell, “Off with his head!”
The movie travels all over the world, from foreign countries like Austria and Italy to the US’s very own South America. The locations are very pretty and there was a really amazing scene that involved horses, which I would have preferred to see more of because, when I was younger, I was a huge fan of The Black Stallion books (well, not all of them. I didn’t like Island Stallion’s Fury as much as the others, but it wasn’t awful. It’s just that the bad guy in that was soooo mean to horses that I think I didn’t like it because of that) and I used to ride Jocko when I would visit my Nana, so I just really have a soft spot for horses.
A Picture of Daniel Craig Shooting Up
Mr. Craig’s Quantum of Solace had some good scenes, but it also gave a few things that weren’t as appetizing as Mr. Craig himself. First of all, the title makes no sense. I looked up the words: Quantum is a unit of weight like a pound or an inch, while Solace means being alone. A Pound of Loner? WTF? It sounds more like Mr. Craig wants his movie to be taken seriously, so he wanted to give it a name that sounded smart like Secret Life of Bees or The Curious Benjamin Button Case or Beverly Hills Chihuaua. Oh, and the image of a dead nude woman painted head to toe in black oil seemed sort of racist. That’s the kind of stuff that people did in the Civil War days! I don’t know if any Britain countries even have black people, so it might just be that they don’t know any better, but it made me kind of uncomfortable, especially since there were black people in the theater when I saw it. I felt soooo bad for them.
Paparazzi Are Jerks To Mr. and Mrs. Craig
Granted, this is only the second film, so I think Mr. Craig is still getting a feeling of what he wants the movies to be. The character of James Bond is strictly an action guy, I get that, but Mr. Craig should think about approaching action movies differently. For example, I would love to see the Bond character find out that he has a son and they have to go on adventures together, fight people, all the while trying to get to know each other. Maybe the son is really angry because he feels abandoned and plays guitar in a band or maybe he’s kind of nerdy and Daniel Craig’s kind of embarrassed. I don’t know, something like that.
I suppose that since it is an action movie, it doesn’t have to make sense, which works out because this one totally doesn’t.
I give Quantum of Solace 2 out of 5 winks.
Tags: 90265, action, assassin, bang, blockbuster, bond, britain, cinema, craig, Cuteness, daniel, daniel craig, england, guns, hollywood, james bond, Malibu, Movie, movie reviews, popcorn, quantum of solace, queen, review, sexy, Shia, smartness, spy, tween, water, youthful opinion
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November 24, 2008 at 03:45
Thanks for the shout out, V.
You are right tho. The movie made no sense but DC wuz sizzling. MEOW.
November 25, 2008 at 00:43
Interesting, you must have been living under a rock for most of your life. Quantum of Solace is not the 2nd James Bond film and there has never been a James Bond TV series. Quantum is actually the 22nd movie in the Bond series. The film series started in 1962 with Dr. No starring Sean Connery (ever heard of him?). The films were the Star Wars or The Dark Knight of the 1960’s. Adjusted for inflation, the movie Thunderball (1965) was a bigger hit than The Dark Knight. The movies were based on a series of popular novels by Ian Fleming. Daniel Criag is the 6th actor to portray James Bond on the big screen (Sean Connery, George Lazenby, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton and Pierce Brosnan were the other 5). Ask your parents about James Bond – they can tell you about him.
November 25, 2008 at 03:45
Please stop reviewing movies. You have no idea what you are talking about. Please review your “facts” on Bond. It was never a cable TV show.
November 25, 2008 at 09:08
Only the comments are funnier than the review. But its all the same cause I did lol.
November 25, 2008 at 14:08
This is either a poor attempt at dry wit or a painfully dumb child. Either way, I wish to no longer participate in reading your blog. Utter rubbish.
November 26, 2008 at 01:29
Hmmm, sweetie first of all a trilogy would be something like Lord of the Rings where there are more than two movies made and less than umm four. Batman, Iron Man, as well as Transformers will be sequels. Also James Bond was not a lame TV show in fact the coolest James Bond ever would be Sean Connery not Daniel Craig. If Robert Ebert were dumb and blonde, and decided to give opinions he would be you. Unless there is some underlining intelligent point, or research paper your writing for your doctorate saying how we pay more attention to movies than to current events then you might be on to something.
November 26, 2008 at 03:12
Valerie, dear,
Those “lame tv series” productions you see of James Bond starring “a bunch of different actors” are the original MOVIES. Do your research child. The only reason you’ve even HEARD of the character James Bond (other than the fact you own a tv) is because a british author named Ian Flemming wrote about a ficticious spy….back in the 1950’s.
These books, “From Russia with Love ” in particular, were so popular, in part because John F. Kennedy (I trust youve heard of HIM) and his recommendation; movies were made from them.
Sean Connery was the FIRST Bond and set the standard. Not Daniel Craig….not by a long shot, though he is …..satifactory, in the role.
Watch them. In order. Before you attempt to review something which you so obviously need an education. Do your homework.
November 26, 2008 at 06:20
You have no idea about what you are reviewing! There are 22 total James bond films, 22!. From 1953 – 2008. Maybe next time you write a review, do a little research….. wow dingbat
March 12, 2009 at 14:13
Which one came out in 1953, I wonder? Seems to me Dr. No was WRITTEN in 1958 and made into the first Bond movie in 1962.
November 26, 2008 at 07:51
Actually barbara Barry Nelson was the first actor to play bond. Research done.
November 27, 2008 at 02:36
you are an idiot you have obviously never watched a James Bond movie in your life… Hollywood has always liked making hit movies into series…the math is simple if people liked the first one than you can get people to pay money to go see the second one. .. and this is the 22 instalment in the Bond franchise its been a series long before the movie series were popular…M is not his mother but his boss and has been since the creation of her Character in 1962’s “Dr. No” and the reason bond doesnt get introuble is becuase he is a British Secret agent and has a Licence to Kill as sugested in 1989’s fill with the same title
As for your fond love of horses it has nothing to do with the movie you are reviewing and has no place in your article to be quite frank tell some who cares.
As for the title the definitions state as
solace-comfort in sorrow, misfortune, or trouble; alleviation of distress or discomfort.
quantum-as in quantity;or amount
so the plot line points to the meaning of the title Bond is seeking revenge on his deceased love for an amount of comfort (ding ding ding)
Bond is not an action hero, and this is the first film that potrays him as one…Bond is all about the suave devinare ladies man who loves a good good cigerette and a fine martini, who just so happens to be a double agent
he is an additude not the hate blinded, revengeness persona made out to be in this fill
and as for your suggestion to plot line…why would Bond run into his son…how would his son know where to find him his where abouts are top secret…why after 46 years of sleeping around would his sone come out of the wood work…maybe his son can be played by Shia Labouf and can be JUST like the newest Indiana Jones.
my advise to you is maybe you should stick to sharing your movie reviews with your freinds and family and not with the world…or at least know your movie and its history before giving an opinon on it
November 27, 2008 at 05:27
It’s nice of Sean to try to pretend “Quantum of Solace” isn’t the lamest movie title ever, and to even attempt to turn it into something deep. Since he keeps a dictionary so handy, he may want to look up “devinare” and then compare it to an actual word like oh, I don’t know… debonair?
November 27, 2008 at 06:27
I enjoyed and agreed with some of your comments but you really don’t have a clue what’s going on in the Bond universe do you? Bond is not a trilogy, it has almost two dozen movies in the series. The T.V. series that you mentioned? Those were the old Bond films being played on T.V. years after their theatrical release. That wasn’t Bond’s wife that drowned it was his girlfriend. M is his boss, not his mom. He doesn’t get in trouble for hitting people? He’s a secret agent! He only gets in trouble for killing the wrong person or getting filmed doing it. The definition of Quantum being used wasn’t “pound” it was “sudden and significant”. And “solace” means being comforted. The title would be better translated as “the sudden and significant state of being comforted”. As in he finds comfort in revenge. Quantum was also the name of the evil corporation that he was investigating. And what was that rant you went on about the dead woman covered in oil? They killed her and poured oil into her lungs! What on EARTH is racist about that?! And “I don’t know if any Britain countries even have black people…”? What the heck are you TALKING about?! First of all, yes there are black people in England. Second of all, “Britain” is being used incorrectly there. It’s the “United Kingdom” or if you want to dumb it down to one island “England”. “Britain” these days is only used when speaking about “Great Britain” as in the kingdom as a whole. And if you had asked any of the black people in the theatre if they thought that scene was a derogatory racial comment they would have looked at you like you were crazy. You also make it sound like Daniel Craig made this movie all by himself. He’s just the actor! He didn’t write it he just did what the director told him to do and that’s that. You’re suggestion for Bond to have a son shows a thorough misunderstanding of the character and I don’t even know where to begin with that one. All I can say is that you seem very young and your suggestion was very contrived. I can only wonder if you even watched this movie or just talked with your friends and sent text messages on your cell phone the whole time. I really do not mean to be condescending it is just that your review appears to have been written from that point of view. I truly hope that you are a satirist and not that childish. If you are writing satire you should keep in mind that it is not funny when no one gets the joke. You should include the “satirist” title into your self-description. It would bring the reader in on the joke and allow them to view your writings in this light. Other than that I hope all is well with you and I hope you keep trying at the reviews.
November 27, 2008 at 08:33
Grats on being one of the most reviled, untalented people on the net. What a waste of life.
November 27, 2008 at 08:38
So do you really just plain stupid or are you just seeking attention by acting so stupid?
November 27, 2008 at 08:39
*do is supposed to are. Typo.
November 27, 2008 at 09:06
HI valerie,
first of all, before you post a review like this one go and do your research. This is not the second bond movie, and it probably didn’t make sense to you because you didn’t pay attention? my 8 cousin understood it. You must either be below the age of 8, or just a dumb blonde.
PS
“On a Lame Cable Show That No One Watches? Why, Yes We Are.”
that made me LOL pretty hard. considering almost every bond movie takes over the box office when it comes out. And they play it because the ratings are high. DUH
November 27, 2008 at 23:12
thanks widzworth. Just checked it out. “Jimmy Bond” say it aint so! Now we’ve ALL done our research.
November 28, 2008 at 06:18
Valerie,
I saw the whole first movie all the way through. If I was Mr. Craig I’d be talking to a lawyer right now instead of just going around beating people up and shooting at them and stuff. In the first one his girlfriend drowned in an elevator, in a public building, that sank into the water. What a lawsuit (Cha-ching)! After he got that settlement, maybe he wouldn’t have to work for his mom anymore. He doesn’t seem like such a good son, anyway, and she’d probably be glad not to have him around so much, y’know? I mean, all he does is drink and hang around casinos an wreck cars and stuff. If I did half of the stuff he gets away with, I’d never get my license. Maybe that’s why his mom always seems so pissed off. I know my mom would be.
November 29, 2008 at 12:54
I vote for this being a parody.
Also “quantum” isn’t any old amount rather it is a very SMALL amount (for example as used in quantum physics). So the title actually means “a very small aount of solace”.
November 30, 2008 at 02:25
This has got to be a joke. This review is utter trash. Nonsensical rubbish. You’re really not this stupid…are you?
November 30, 2008 at 12:40
Oh. I get it now. Very clever. This review is a parody. Isn’t it?
December 3, 2008 at 06:41
Wow, the only people in the world more stupid than the author PRETENDS to be are the people who take these reviews seriously. I know most fanboys are a few fries short of a happy meal but this just goes beyond idiotic.
December 3, 2008 at 07:01
I don’t know about action movies, but I do think this is another wonderful review, sweety.
You should let Nana know you mentioned her.
December 5, 2008 at 07:17
Haha, I love how people get so passionate when commenting, as if you have directly insulted them!
Great review hun. Keep writing, coz we love reading!
x
December 13, 2008 at 19:58
Oh, girl. You so got me in trouble this morning. I was laughing so loud, I woke up my house guest and I think the upstairs neighbors even heard me. Keep ‘em coming!
December 21, 2008 at 08:49
wow, i got told to read this review for how ridiculous it is, its BRILLIANT
January 29, 2009 at 15:43
Excellent. “What if we give the sad guy a gun?” is sheer genius. I am going to nab that and pass it off as my own. Thanks you very much for your spot-on reviews.
February 22, 2009 at 13:35
Did Keanu Reeves do James Bond once? A friend told me he was in a trilogy.
March 12, 2009 at 06:01
Chris, Ryan, Sean, Justin Igger, Movieman, you’re the biggest noob on the net. Congratulations on sinking to a brand new level of sucking the stupid-dick. You’re insults prove to me that you are low life cyber-bullies who have the IQ of a carrot. Congratulations on pulling down the average level of human intelligence, we really appreciate you skewing the bell curve. Why don’t you all form a shit-for-brains commune where you can smoke each others poles until some synapses start firing.
May 8, 2009 at 10:33
you said it, You guys are f***ing stupid! You are almost like Mr. Bond himself. You kill people and blow up buildings but you do it in the name of the Queen or whatever. You use your deep psychic pain for the forces of good!
July 19, 2009 at 15:29
Wow, please tell me that review is some kind of hilarious in-joke or something, because wow. How can someone who knows so little about movies review them. How can someone who doesnt even know about the Bond series review any movie? Thats like not knowing what Star Wars is.